Numb

As I get older, there are more things I don't care about. Things that used to consume my time and thoughts have now become ordinary.

That's how humans are. We always change.

The path in life that I chose, with full awareness and my own will, led me down a road that wasn't smooth.

Full of potholes. Lots of rocks. And not infrequently, I was forced to turn back. It wasn't easy.

But all that discomfort shaped who I am today. Being treated badly over and over made me resistant. Immune.

Among the things that eventually made it onto my list of indifference is being talked about by others.

Honestly, I don't really care when other people talk badly about me. In fact, you could say I've already surrendered myself to being talked about (good or bad) by anyone. I've become numb. I don't care.

At least, there are three reasons behind this:

1. If someone talks badly about me, it's not a problem, because I'm not a good person anyway. I'm just a tiny dot in this vast universe. I'm nothing. I'm nobody.
2. I don't have much time and energy. Daily affairs are already exhausting. Confused about dividing my schedule between work and rest. Not to mention having to make time for loved ones.
3. Dealing with what others say doesn't contribute anything to my education or career.

Reaching the point of not caring about others is truly not an easy matter. I too have felt how other people's words pierced my feelings and haunted my thoughts. But when it happened over and over again, I became numb, I no longer cared.